Rollercoaster Love Finally Ends.

It has been a long time since i made an entry in here, and boy have things changed. The roller coaster ride of love we had was the most intense, crazy ride i have ever been on within the last few months, and especially the last full month. I gave everything i had to someone who had thrown it all away long before i even knew. Today i find out from his new girl, that they ACTUALLY have been seeing each other for months, since January to be exact. She had no clue, like i did. All the bull that has occurred within the last few weeks seems to have it's answers. The problems she had given me was of a girlfriend annoyed with her boy's ex. Only to find out he isn't this great person she thought he was.

How can people create such situations? Act the way they do with people? It upsets me to see so many great women and men have this type of situation happen to them. Where you see a GREAT girlfriend and boyfriend only to see them be cheated on, broken hearted, and in my case emotionally, and mentally abused.

As much as it killed me to hear her say they were together for months, it helped me realize something, that now i can help her from not getting lost in his ways, to not fall victim like i did with his love & hurt. Now she has the choice to walk away & save herself or listen to my words and still put herself in a very bad situation. I am not the type of person to say negative things about others, to purposely hurt others or cause some type of suffering on people, im the complete opposite and will do whatever i can to bring good into other's lives and possibly help out a young girl from making something i know is a huge mistake. I could care less who he sees, who the next girlfriend he cheats on would be; because i know he will cheat again, but it just pains me to know that he could put a girl through what i went through. All the pain and the tears was not worth it, and i regret staying.

I regret letting your mind games take control, i regret letting your cries for attention be the reason i did not let go. Where whenever i would try to take a break, break the whole thing off or just give me some space to breathe, you would threaten suicide. The worst thing is, you knew it would get to me, you knew i couldn't just say no and not care. You knew my love for you was strong, that all i want is for happiness in the eyes of everyone, you took that and used it against me.

It's because of this that i will be the strongest person that i could ever be, now. That i will NEVER let someone treat me the way you treated me and find someone who will feel so lucky to have me be the one in their lives. There is one thing i have noticed within friends in my life. These guys (or girls) who do this, usually do it to amazing people, the best significant other too. My friend told me something that i will always believe about myself to. She told me she knows she has all the great aspects of being an amazing girlfriend & she will find someone who will accept it and treat her the same. We all have that someone out there for us, and those horrible people will come and try to destroy us, destroy that faith and hope. The only thing is, once we truly understand how great we are, how great we can be, and portray that? We will be able to get what we want, and good things will happen.

I have always believed in karma. I know that for my actions i shall get good things in return, no matter how long it may take. I understand that the actions my ex are taking are things that will not make a good ending in his life. There is always the phrase, not sure exactly how it goes, but it's along the lines of "you can kill with kindness" I have always believed being a good person, a nice, loving, sweet person will bring those actions in your life, if your not like that, what good would actually come?